Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Childrens Hope Chest

Just saw this video on YouTube and wanted to share. Tom Davis is doing amazing things in Ethiopia. We are praying for his mission work there. I'll post a link to his blog a little later. This video is very moving.....we are so blessed and have so much to share with these children in Ethiopia. I just want to do more.....

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

My Brain Won't Turn Off

So I've been laying in bed for 1 hour and 36 minutes and I just can't go to sleep. I've tossed and turned and finally decided to get up and do some reading.
Part of the reason I can't settle tonight is that Joel and I had a conversation over dinner about our adoption. We are truly seeking God's will in our family and we want to make sure we are in the center of His plans. The question is, " Should we continue to pursue adopting 2 siblings from Ethiopia or should we adopt 1 child from Ethiopia now, with plans to adopt another child in the future?" We've discussed this before and some of the reasons we are considering this change in child preference is that adopting 1 child at a time is more likely to be quicker in terms of adoption processing. We are due to move this summer and it would really be simpler paperwork-wise to be HOME with our adopted child prior to our move. Another reason is for attachment and bonding time. Adopted children grieve and have experienced major traumatic life changes in their tiny lives......we have learned that many adoption adjustments and transitions are often very hard and challenging at first. One child struggling emotionally vs. two children struggling emotionally at one time is another consideration for us. This will no doubt be tough, especially on me. Not to mention, our bio kids will have some adjusting to do also!!
We feel the Lord has definitely called us to adopt 2 children--- we just aren't sure whether it's 2 at one time or 1 at a time, twice. Is that as clear as mud or what??? :)

So--- I couldn't sleep and I opened my One-Year Bible and started reading today's scripture and this is what the Lord had for me tonight.......

Psalm 121:1-8 " I look up to the mountains-does my help come from there? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let you stumble; the one who watches over you will not slumber. Indeed, he who watches over Israel never slumbers or sleeps. The Lord himself watches over you! The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade. The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon at night. The Lord keeps you from all harm and watches over your life. The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever."

Is that an amazing truth or what? Can you believe the timing of me reading that scripture? Our God is all knowing and all powerful. He gives me such comfort in the middle of my worries and I'm humbled that He speaks to ME through His Word. I'm so blessed that He knows my every need. I can relax because HE will watch over me, He never sleeps or slumbers because He is protecting me. He is watching over my life, He is my help, and He will not let me stumble.

Ok--- that's not it, though. I told you God is amazing....listen to what else He had to say to me tonight. The Proverb for today was this:

Proverbs 28: 27-28 "Whoever gives to the poor will lack nothing, but those who close their eyes to poverty will be cursed. When the wicked take charge, people go into hiding. When the wicked meet disaster, the godly flourish."

I can go to bed now. I can stop worrying. I know the answer. I know that the Lord will show us the children He has chosen for us to raise and teach and love, in His perfect timing. I know that He will provide. If I will just give of myself unselfishly, I will lack nothing. I shared in an earlier post that I struggle with selfish motivations. I just want things in my life to be easy and comfortable. The Lord sees right through my selfish concerns and in this Proverb, He speaks directly to me,again..... that I should not close my eyes to poverty but be willing to be a living sacrafice- and have mercy for these little children.

I am humbled. I know I can't do this alone. I don't have the strength, but I am trusting and I have faith and I believe with all my heart that GOD WILL PROVIDE me with the strength I need when the trials come.

Please pray for us that we'll stand firm in following the calling God has for us, that we'll not waiver, and that we'll be strengthened on the journey.

Since God never slumbers and He's watching out for me.....I'm going to rest tonight.

Goodnight with Blessings,
Amy

BTW....I worked on our Dossier today and we are OH SO CLOSE to being done!!

Monday, December 1, 2008

Thansgiving Week

It's been a busy and eventful Thanksgiving week. What an amazing time to reflect and ponder the many gifts God's given to us that we have to be THANKFUL for.
We have been so blessed.
I am just silenced by my thoughts of all I have to be thankful to our Lord for. I can't count or list them all. I am so grateful for God's love for me, His provision, His mercy, His grace, His plan. Wow-- I am truly overwhelmed by God's goodness to me. I am so undeserving yet still so loved.
We are so blessed.
Our family enjoyed a safe trip to Texas for the long weekend. It was a long time in the car- 19 hours total driving time (9.5 hours each way) but it's so nice to live close enough right now to our extended family that we are ABLE to drive home for the holidays. What a blessing within itself. The time together was wonderful. This visit was also a time when we felt we should and could share with our extended family our calling to adopt. We were able to share with most of our extended family our adoption journey and the compassion we feel for the hungry, thirsty, and naked children of Ethiopia.

"For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; 36 naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’ 37 “Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? 38 ‘And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? 39 ‘When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 40 “The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me." Matthew 28
Thank you Lord for our family's reception to our adoption and their encouragement to us in our attempt and obedience in following You. The positive response was not what I had expected. I was honestly very nervous to share our adoption plans with my grandparents and some of my aunts and uncles whom I believed to still struggle with some generational racial prejudices. I was so relieved by their openness to the idea of adopting children of color into our family. This was just another evidence of the work of the Lord in our family. This was just another blessing from the Lord to me this weekend. Thank you Lord.
Our adoption journey continues......this week we are working on paperwork for our dossier and our goal is to have ALL the documents compiled and ready to go to the notary by Friday. Please pray for the Lord's perfect timing in all our document processing as we are moving this summer. Many people have said, "Why don't you wait until you move to do the paperwork so it's not so complicated and time sensitive?" The answer to that question is......The Lord has spoken to us and has placed in our hearts a strong passion and an overwhelming sense of urgency to complete this adoption NOW and not later. We trust that His plan is greater than our plans and HE will provide the way.
So please join us this week in praying for God's perfect timing and also for God's protection and love to cover the needs of the specific children He will bring to our family.
Many Blessings,
Amy

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Moving Forward

So this has been a big week for us. We completed our homestudy document/paper chase, drove it to our local homestudy agency and wrote our first check to pay for the homestudy which is the first step for an international adoption. WOW-- it felt so great to hand over our packet and know that we are 1/3 of the way through the paperwork!!! YEA!! We finally chose our international agency this week, also and mailed off that application to start working on the next step. Please continue to pray that God guides our way in this journey!

Blessings-
Amy

Monday, November 17, 2008

BLESSINGS

"Great is the Lord and greatly to be praised." +Psalms 48:1

Today has been a good day. The Lord has blessed me with sweet friendships. Madilyn has been struggling with diving off the block in swim team and has been feeling super defeated and down about her fear and its effect on her swim performance. She's shed many a tear over this one. Yesterday, out of the blue, a dear friend offered to help coach Madilyn this morning in a private lesson. Upon returning from the coaching session, Madilyn burst into the house, raised both hands to the sky, and yelled, "I CAN DIVE OFF THE BLOCK NOW!!!" :) She was so excited and relieved and proud. The Lord knows our every hurt and need and He meets those needs by placing people in our lives to minister to us and help us. I was so blessed and humbled by His provision for Madilyn this morning and for helping her overcome her fear. YEA GOD!!!



We are still praying about our international agency decision and will ask you to join us in praying that God guides us to the agency he wants us to use for our adoption and that He will make the path very clear to us. This decision is a hard one for us for some reason. We are still moving forward with our homestudy but haven't signed contracts with an international agency yet.



Another huge praise today.....

As of tonight, we have completed the paperwork portion of our homestudy (YEA!) and I am going to drive the documents to the homestudy agency tomorrow. (YEA!) We have a class to attend this weekend on International adoption and we'll do our final homestudy visit on December 8. We're 1/3 of the way there with the paperwork processing!!



By the way--- our sermon on Sunday was on Matthew 9:12 "On hearing these things, Jesus said, 'It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous but sinners."



I was so touched and moved that God feeds me small bites and helps me learn and grow in His goodness with baby steps!! For months, I've been really praying that God will give me the strength to make my life a living sacrifice.... and then, in this passage He says "I DESIRE MERCY, NOT SACRIFICE." Hmmmmm.......now where does this lead me......If Mercy is a word used to describe compassion shown by one person to another, or a request from one person to another, then serving others with compassion and being selfless for another's benefit will be joyful and not a duty. I do desire to have mercy towards others as Jesus is saying to do, and in this compassion- the giving and loving and doing for others will come from my heart, it will be joyful and most importantly it will glorify God. I do want to be MERCIFUL and through that act of compassion, I want to share God's goodness and love with the oppressed. I am now praying that God will give me a stronger conviction to have mercy and compassion for others and to stop worrying about the "sacrifice" that I am making in this little life of mine. True JOY is about putting Jesus first, Others second, and Yourself last.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Living Sacrafice

"I beseech you, therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." +Romans 12:1-2

For many months now, this verse has continued to speak to my heart and weigh heavily on my daily actions. This is a "life verse" for me right now where I am walking; this is a "rhema" word in my life. The specific words in this verse of scripture that have deep meaning to me are the words "living sacrifice."

To me, the word "living" speaks that this sacrifice is not a sacrifice of something dead, but it is definitely a sacrifice done by those living, breathing, and alive. It means in my LIFE. The word sacrifice, wow--- this one is big-- it is the work, the hard work. True labor for the Lord. Something that hurts when we give of ourselves. A willingness to suffer for Christ's sake. So when I think of these two words together, I am humbled. I am so humbled.

My LIFE, my every breath, action, and deed needs to be a LABOR and WILLINGNESS to suffer for the purpose of Christ. A living sacrifice.

This is a big RHEMA word for me from the Holy Spirit. I've been struggling with my sinful nature. My life's purpose is not fulfilled in my comfort and enjoyment and living inside my nice little family bubble. I'm not here on this earth at this particular time to just enjoy being alive and being entertained. While God does bless us and give us joy and rest every day, His greater purpose for me is not to watch movies, shop until I drop, play games, and eat dessert for my entire lifetime until I join Him in eternity. He wants more from me. God calls me to be a LIVING SACRIFICE in this verse. To be willing to work for His higher purpose. To be willing to uncomfortable, to reach out above and beyond what I think I can do each day to survive and instead EXTEND myself so that I can SERVE His calling. He requires me to live so that in my actions, deeds and focus- I sacrifice for Jesus. To share His love with others. To live outside my little bubble world and share the Gospel message with the world.

This verse has specific adoption meaning for me today especially as I doubt myself, my abilities. This speaks to me as I feel weak and small, unsure of this adoption road and my families future. I'm going to share how this "Rhema" word that God spoke to me lies here in this dilemma in my worldly brain vs. God's word.

I am so happy with our family. I have 4 beautiful and healthy children. I have a wonderful husband. I have a beautiful home in a great community. I have a great extended family. I love to homeschool and we are in a good school rhythm right now so I'm feeling super blessed. I have financial peace and security--- we are not rich by monetary standards, but we do just fine with what we have and we don't WANT for much of anything. So, this is my "bubble" world. It's perfect in my mind, but in my heart, I feel like God is calling for us to do more, be more, give more, love more, serve more. God has more good things planned for us, more good things, he just wants us to be a "living sacrifice" so he can bless us more richly and deeply.

The Lord has spoken to my heart that those good things He has planned for us will be found in the addition of adopted children into our family and the blessings they will bring to our family. In my selfishness, I am not proud to say that adopting will be too hard. It's too much paperwork, time and money to spend. It will require more emotional time, patience and mommy-duty for me. It will require me to homeschool MORE kiddos. It will be tougher financially to make those ends meet every month. It will change the dynamics with our 4 great kids. It will just make my life harder. Period. I'll have to sacrifice.

Thus, my LIVING SACRIFICE today is in my willingness to change and be obedient in God's calling and to give unselfishly of my heart, my daily schedule, my money, my time, my energy, my family, and my home. It's being WILLING to work harder in my home to provide and share God's love to these precious children that God has chosen to grow in our family. He has chosen the children and He has chosen us. I am choosing and willing be a LIVING SACRIFICE in the face of this adoption.....I am struggling with my worldliness and sinful nature- but my hope is in God and I believe His promise to me in Jeremiah 29:11. I feel His love and I want to share His love. I want to be a living sacrifice for Jesus! :)

-- Amy

Friday, November 7, 2008

Fall is here!!


Well, the weather has really cooled off here in Kansas and it is also windy!! Welcome Fall!! It's so wonderful to watch the glory of our God's creation unfold with the changing of the seasons. So refreshing to know that to every thing there is a season.


"To everything there is a season,a time for every purpose under the sun.A time to be born and a time to die;a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;a time to kill and a time to heal ...a time to weep and a time to laugh;a time to mourn and a time to dance ...a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;a time to lose and a time to seek;a time to tear and a time to sew;a time to be silent and a time to speak;a time to love and a time to hate;a time for war and a time for peace."
+Ecclesiastes 3:1-8


For our family, this fall is a time that we are loving, laughing, dancing, embracing, and SEEKING. We are seeking the Lord's will for our family. We are working on our adoption paperwork and daily face challenges and struggles that cause us to need to SEEK Him and His guidance on our lives. We don't know what our future holds......with the military lifestyle and an impending move this coming summer-- we have lots of questions about the effects this will have on our adoption process and the timing of things. We don't know where we will be moving yet, how long the waiting will be after our dossier is completed, and also if a deployment will face us within the next year or two and these are matters that only God knows. These are huge adoption issues. So I am trusting that the Lord has led us to this place in the adoption journey and that HE KNOWS and HE has a plan better than anything I can orchestrate!!! "Ask and it shall be given unto you, Seek and you shall find." +Matthew 7:7-8. My prayer today is that as I submit to Christ in all I do, He will cleanse my heart and mind - He will reveal to me His will and His way, And His unchanging love.